Countless times, I have been accused of ‘thinking too much’…making things way too complicated…reading more into something than is really there.
I call, “Bullshit!”
The only way life is not complicated is if you’re living on autopilot, just going through the motions. And there is ALWAYS more to someone or something than you see at first glance. (And make no mistake – autopilot only allows a first glance, if that.)
God gave me this intuition, and yes, it freaks me out a bit sometimes to be ‘right’ about this person or that outcome, but it also comforts me to know that I can once again begin to trust my little voice.
My little voice is not the nay-sayer that I hear in my head. In fact, I don’t believe my little voice lives in my head, at all. She lives somewhere else – in my heart, in my gut, maybe even in my soul.
I think, sometimes, that my little voice took the biggest hit, bigger than the one I took, even, when I was living my ‘crazy life of before’. She tried to warn me. She tried to stop me. She told me I was repeating mistakes from the past, but would I listen? Oh no. By listening to everyone and everything BUT her, I lost my connection with her. She didn’t break it – I did.
Once disconnected, that nay-sayer voice in my head started sounding a lot like my little voice, kinda ventriloquist-style, and I stupidly allowed that idiot to shape more of my world view than I now care to admit.
Now that I’m living ‘my crazy life after’, I’m diligently trying to reconnect with my little voice, and as usual, she’s willing – it’s me that’s being difficult.
So sue me – I think a lot. I even meditate (gasp!!)
It’s the only way I know to reconnect with me, the real me, the me that’s been in there all this time and wants, no – NEEDS – to be running this show.
And it’s high time, too.