I’ve always known my kids are smart. Most of the time, their smarts serve them well. But, on the odd occasion, their smarts get them into deep, deep doo-doo. PDD is eyeball-deep in doo-doo right about now, thanks to her smarts.
Let me rewind.
Monday morning, while PDD was getting ready for school, I was drinking my coffee and checking my email. I saw a PayPal payment receipt for a registrant for a teleclass I’m holding next week, so I logged in to my PayPal account to check it out.
Imagine my horror when I saw a pending charge for $174.92 from…get this…Build-A-Bear Workshop dated 10:21am Sunday morning!!!
In a roar that could be heard for miles, I called PDD to my office. She’s been harping on me to get her a Build-A-Bear ever since Christmas. She denied any knowledge of how such a charge could have appeared. Given that it was pending, not cleared, there wasn’t much for me to do but wait.
And I didn’t have to wait long. Tuesday afternoon, the FedEx truck pulled up in front of the house and delivered a Scruffy Puppy and not one, but NINE…count them: N-I-N-E outfits! All delivered Next Day Air to the tune of $50.90!!!!!
In the words of Second Son, “This must be one of those times that your kid screws up SO BAD that you can’t even get mad about it – you just have to laugh.”
Uhh….yeah.
Needless to say, my darling PDD and I had a heart-to-heart conversation upon her arrival from school Tuesday afternoon.
Thanks in large part to my parent coach (and HELL YES, I have a parent coach! I’m a single mom, for cryin’ out loud – I KNOW I need the back up!) – I have resisted the urge to kill her. So far…
I let her stew in her own guilty juices for a day or so before issuing any kind of edicts as to consequences and restitution.
All the other issues aside, I have to say I’ve got a pretty damn smart 9 y/o daughter. She managed to get through and complete 3 checkout screens, figured out how to upgrade the shipping to the quickest (and most expensive) option available, and completed her purchase using my PayPal debit card. Had she chosen another card, I might not have known about it until FedEx showed up.
Even Oldest Son was impressed. He said, and I quote, “Damn, Mom! She’s got bigger balls than either one of us (meaning he and Second Son)! There’s no way he or I would have had the nerve to try and pull off a heist like that!”
And let me assure you – that’s sayin’ something coming from him…
Oh come on! Build-A-Bear bears are adorable! How can you stay mad at her? Also how did she get her hands on the card?
I’m pretty sure she just helped herself to my wallet to get the card. But how can I stay mad at her? Uhh…pretty easily, actually. And I wouldn’t say I am “mad”…I’m more disappointed. Impressed, yes – but disappointed, overall.
Well, we KNOW where she gets the smarts from. . . it’s the deviousness you wanna worry about, LOL!
What’s the penalty going to be?
Well, she’s banned from all the computers. That, alone, has some major consequences in her world: all her virtual pets will likely starve to death in her absence.
Second, I was going to surprise her and take her to the Jonas Brothers concert in May for her birthday (she LOVES Joe Jonas) – but that’s out now. She spent the ticket money, and then some.
Lastly, she has to work off the $50.90 in shipping doing chores at $1.50/day (yes, third, maybe fourth world labor rates, I realize.) I divided the $50.90 by the number of days until her birthday (33) to come up with the daily rate. I want her free of slave labor by her birthday, but the month of working for peanuts will be good for her.
I thought about taking her with me to the post office and having her hand it over to the clerk to send it all back, and I still may do that, too.
Hey, Suzanne—
Love how you handled the situation. You showed amazing self-restraint! 🙂 Way to go!
I also love the idea of having her hand it over to the post office clerk–very powerful….
I’m still reeling from laughter about the overnight shipping!
Karen 🙂
OMG that is crazy. I never would have done anything like that when I was a kid.
Reminds me of the time my 3 yr old daughter poured glue on half of the piano keys. In her defense, a key had come loose and was in need of fixing…..but I lost control that day and chased her under the table, delivered my (one and only ever!) whop to her butt and said in a very strong tone: You are not allowed to use glue until you’re 18!
Ahhh motherhood. Wish I had had a parent coach! I know I did the best I could, but thinking back–would have loved to do some things differently! Sara
Karen – thanks (as always) for your support.
Sara – I think that’s one of the things I like best about having my kids spread so far apart in age – I do get the opportunity to do some things differently. Ahhh motherhood…is right!
I can’t help myself. I am still getting a good laugh out of this one… The mental image is what is doing it. I can just picture her sitting there talking to herself while ordering. ” oh oh oh this one is so cute (in that squeaky little girl voice), oh and this outfit is so cute and I like this one, and that one…..” Well at least you will get some things done around the house while she works off her debt …LOL
You gotta give her props – she was pretty sneaky about it. Obviously if she was a mastermind genius criminal she’d make the receipt look like it was for something else (like a t-shirt for her father or a toy for one of her syblings). But it was pretty smart nevertheless.
Oh my gosh. I would have probably killed my daughters! not literally but inflict some type of harsh punishment and penance. And to know that your 9 year old did that… absolutely crazy.
I was wondering how this one was going to play out.
I like your idea about taking her with you to the post office to return it all. Consequences young one…consequences.
Stories like this remind me how much I can’t be a mom, except for my dog of course. I think I would have blown a Sicilian gasket for sure and trust me, that ain’t pretty.
Yap-she’s a genius! It still takes me a while to figure those check-out screens.I guess she took matters into her own hands.
Kids these days are so smart! And definitely brave, I would NOT have been safe doing that to my mom. Did you end up sending it back?